Straws R (not) Us?

Where do they hide the smoothie straws? Seriously, those nice, wide ones for sipping thicker drinks? Are they not available in stores? Hidden in some secret, undisclosed location for sale only to the Smoothie Trade? Inquiring minds want to know. I asked my fave smoothie seller but the response was all very "I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you."

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