Dear Dick's Sporting Goods: You Are The Spawn of Satan

Just for fun again THIS year let's play the "Which Item Does the Dick's Sporting Goods coupon actually apply to game! (Answer: gum). The list of exclusions on a Dick's Sporting Goods coupon is mind-boggling. I think it would be simpler for them to have written "everything in our inventory." True story last year their own Customer Service could not tell me what I could actually use a coupon code for. http://www.dickssportinggoods.com/shop/index.jsp?categoryId=12312192&camp=Email:11282011CyberMonday

For those playing along at home the exclusions to the use of this coupon/code are: 

% & $ OFF COUPON:
Offer valid only while supplies last and not applicable to canceled orders due to out-of-stock merchandise. Discount does not apply to taxes, shipping and handling charges, gift wrapping or similar charges. Discount not applicable with returned merchandise; total discount will be deducted from the value of any returned item to which the discount applied. Discount excludes the following:

ABU GARCIA ADIDAS GOLF USA INC ANDERSON BAT ANON ASICS ATHALON ATLAS SNOW-SHOE BABOLAT BAUER/NIKE HOCKEY BILLABONG BIONIC BLADERUNNER BLOCK BRIDGESTONE BRINE BROOKS BURTON CALLAWAY GOLF CARHARTT CCM CLAM CLEVELAND GOLF CLUB GLOVE COLUMBIA COMBAT SPORTS INC CONTOUR COSTA DEL MAR SUNGLASSES DAKINE DC DECKERS OUTDOOR CORP. DEMARINI DESCENTE DIAMONDBACK DITA / FIELD HOCKEY NORTH AMERICA

DWINDLE DISTRIBUTION EA SPORTS EASTERN EASTON ECCO USA, INC. ELECTRIC ELEMENT SKATEBOARDS ENJOI ESCALADE EYEKING FITNESS QUEST / TOTAL GYM/AB LOUNGE FLOW FOOTJOY FOXPRO G-LOOMIS GIRO GITA SPORTS LTD GOALIATH GOALRILLA HARO HEAD HUMMINBIRD HURLEY INNOVA J & B IMPORTERS, INC. JANSPORT JORDAN JUGS K2 KETTLER LEGEND DISTRIBUTION LEW’S LIFETIME LOUISVILLE SLUGGER / BIONIC

MAUI JIM MERRELL MIKEN MISSION MIZERAK MIZUNO NAVICO NIKE NIKE PRO NIRVE SPORTS LTD NOKONA OAKLEY ODYSSEY OGIO OLD TOWN O'NEILL PATAGONIA PHITEN USA PING PINNACLE POLAR POWER BALANCE PRANA PRINCE QUIKSILVER RAGE BROADHEADS RALEIGH RAWLINGS RAZORS REACTOR WATCHES RED REEBOK CCM/REEBOK HOCKEY REEBOK ZIG REEBOK NFL JERSEYS

ROLLERBLADE ROSS REELS ROXY SALOMON SAUCONY SCHUTT SPORTS SCOTT SHAUN WHITE SUPPLY CO SHIMANO AMERICAN CORP SKULLCANDY SMITH OPTICS SOLE SOREL SPY SPYDER SRIXON ST. CROIX RODS STRIKE MASTER TAYLOR MADE THE NORTH FACE THULE TIPPMANN TITLEIST TUBBS SNOWSHOES UGG AUSTRALIA UNDER ARMOUR VOLCOM VON ZIPPER WARRIOR WILSON PROFESSIONAL GOLF WILSON SPORTING GOODS YAKIMA ZOO YORK

Also excluded are :Boats, Canoes, Kayaks, Hauling and Storage Racks, Canopies, Shelters, Furniture, Coolers, License and Championship Merchandise, Heaters, Fire Pits, Grills, Smokers, Hammocks & Stands, Team Orders, Gun Safes, Trolling Motors, All Electronics, Fish Locators, GPS, Ellipticals, Table Games, Treadmills, Home Gyms, Weight Benches, Cardio Equipment, Gift Cards and Gift Certificates. Additional exclusions may apply. Cannot be combined with any other promotional offer nor is this offer valid on previous purchases. Entire order must be shipped to a single address and customer is responsible for all shipping costs for returned merchandise. This promotional offer may be modified or terminated at any time without notice.